Remembering Bella

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I went to the park today because it is a beautiful day for a walk, but more importantly because I am missing my dog Bella who passed one year ago today at the age of twelve-years-old.  I knew I would be sad today, but I am so thankful to have had her in my life for all those years – probably the most difficult years I personally had been through.  She was always by my side, keeping me company, giving me a reason to live, keeping me active with walking and giving me someone to care for when no one else was around. She was friendly and funny, loved everyone and went everywhere with me. She knew when I was happy; she knew when I was sad, comforting me always and making her presence known.

I went to the park today because it was her favorite place to be, and I wanted to walk the paths we used to walk and sit at our place under a shade tree where she used to like to take a rest. At one point during my walk I sat on a bench.  A woman walked by with the cutest little dog that looked like a puppy Rottweiler.  She was black with brown spots above her eyes.  The dog came barreling over to me, jumping up to say hello and kissing my hands as I pet her.  She plopped down between my feet and leaned on my legs.  I struck up a conversation with her owner, a genuinely nice lady.  The dog sat contently, occasionally looking back at me every once in a while.  I found out she was not a puppy, but a twelve-year-old.  Her name was Lulu, and she came to the US from Puerto Rico as a rescue puppy. I explained to the lady why I was at the park, and she said I should get another dog because they are so good for us physically and emotionally, and I agreed. Lulu didn’t want to leave, but the woman finally coaxed her to go.  I continued with my walk deep in thought. Maybe Lulu was a sign from Bella to say hello and let me know she is fine and was with me.  At least I would like to believe that to be true.

I have had dogs all my life, ever since I was four-years-old.  I have had them two and three at a time.  I love surrounding myself with animals. To be honest, I would have another dog in a heartbeat, but circumstances haven’t allowed it thus far. Being without one now feels so strange and lonely.

Bella’s favorite place.

 I know in my heart of hearts that there is one more dog to come in my life.  And I believe I will know when I know. Until then I will keep on keeping on.  Remembering Bella with fondness and enjoying other dogs who say hello and dogs of relatives.  I will wait for that day my little one will come along.  I will bring her/him to this park and show him/her Bella’s favorite places.  At least I hope it will happen.

I hope you are running around in heaven with all the pets I have had in my life, my sweet Bella.  And until we meet again thank you for loving me and please know how much I love you.

About susezit

~ Expressing random thoughts and issues is my thing. ~ I’m complicated. ~ I understand quirky. ~ I'm a work in progress. ~ I've discovered I'm pretty strong. ~ I'm trying to become the me I've always wanted to be. (Essays are original works of the author. All rights reserved.)

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